Cold and lonely

Hello all, I feel cold and lonely with a shadow of horrid thoughts, my emotions are broken, my soul crushed, thoughts each day I wake is "Why should I be here?", but i'm only holding on with the only warmth I have that is of my cat Tibbles, otherwise i'd have no hope at all. Why must I suffer this horrid pain?

There will only be the last

I myself have shed so many tears of loneliness deep within me, the coldness, pain, it sits in my soul and I have to bare each day with the thought that haunts every bit of me, feeling as if there will be no warmth for me, no feeling to smile.

The very pain which hurts a kind soul, one that only wanted to make others happy, I cry each day with how ashamed I am living in comfort, only knowing there are others out there living with horror of where they might end up, and what next day will bring.

I only want to be happy, not wanting anymore. If I could change the world to see a single soul smile, I'd save the moment the same way I miss seeing my own true smile.

As I type this.... tears are streaming down my face.

I hope to find my own true smile.

Lonely and broken

I feel as if my life is broken and worthless, where ever I turn, all I tend to feel is horrid thoughts and I keep asking myself if life is worth living If i have to deal with this most of the time.. if any out there is reading this, drop a comment if you want to talk.

Life goes on

Hello everyone,

I know I may have been a bit too quiet, but lately I just felt I needed the break and to help focus my energy on other stuff, anyhow, how have you all been? Lately it's started to snow where I live. post what stuff you have been up to lately.

thanks!

My life through my eyes

Since the day I was born, the day many cherish to have another person brought into this world. Growing up was never easy, had speech issues, and no one could understand me. At school I always sat there watching everyone in the class room, to ensure they all had someone who cared that watched over them.

If anything, my years growing old just become more painful mentally, every step I make, no one seemed to care, and people who I thought was going to actually care, really didnt in the end.

I got threatened, beaten, mentally tortured, and heart broken many many times.

I do still think about a lot of the memories that are there, and every time I think about them, the more I find that I'm really alone.

My life through my teens years also had it terrible years where I had never felt alive, always dark and cold each day along with the nights.

I'm now 28, and still I suffer mentally, honestly as you are maybe reading this, I am sat down in the kitchen, while debating what to eat, it's the only ever pleasure I get from it. If I were to go into detail about the stuff I've experienced and seen, it might be enough to know that truthfully I've had enough with life.

Any souls out there that read this blog, I hope that you are alright and that even though I maybe not there physically, I'll be there mentally.

thanks, 

please drop a comment and let me know how things are.

Jamie Batchelor Electro Dive

http://dlvr.it/RkVp53